Us Versus Them

Recently, a popular book called Unchurched opened the dialogue between the "church" and those who are outside of the church. The charges leveled are that the church has become irrevelant, judgmental, and homophobic. I think that if we were to boil this down to the root problem it is that we have an us versus them attitude. There are those who wish to transform the church and those who wish for it to always remain the same. This operates at every level, whether social, political, and theological.
Several months ago, some folks became defensive about their pastor (me). The feeling was that I am just too liberal. At the time, I was fresh out of seminary and may have given them some ammunition to support that belief. Recently another family has accused me of being too moderate (the middle road). I hope and pray that they are accurate in their assessment.
There is a fear that if "they" come into "our" church, "we" will have to compromise our convictions. See how they pronouns divide? The five hundred pound gorilla in the room is versus. Yet, the question arises of why we are the church. Is it to surround ourselves with people who are just like us, or to transform the world into the Kingdom of God which will contain all kinds of people... male/female, Jew/Greek, slave/free.
Could that also include the things that are not so obvious? Could the local church be a place where liberal and conservative can worship together? White and minority? How about heterosexual and homosexual? Isn't that the risk we take as Christians, that when we are united into the Kingdom, we will be aligned with people not like "us"? Could we not be a church which unites (and) rather than a church that divides (or).
I am not worried about other's perceptions as much as how those who need to hear that there is a God who loves them, but cannot over the shouts of the judgmental. How many do we consign to Hell by condemning them due to a lifestyle or a political/sociological idiology? In other words, if one is told that they are going to Hell, could it not be a self fulfilling prophesy? Are we not responsible at that point for the choice they make? Is it not like the cancer patient who upon hearing their diagnosis, can hear nothing after the word cancer?

Just pondering...